Its a new year again and everyone has something to say about achieving your new year’s resolutions. The morning talk shows, newspapers, and social media are full of how-to’s. They all have great ideas but how many years have you been setting these resolutions without gaining any real traction?
I never really understood why I never found my big break even though my intentions and desires were in the right place. It turns out the key to success is taking control of your life. This is how I experienced my breakthrough with help from the greats like Tony Robbins, John Maxwell and Napolean Hill among others and how you can set yourself up for success, too.
The Essential Human Needs
This may come as a surprise to you, but we are emotional animals and as such we are hard-wired with basic human emotional needs. It may sound primitive, but it’s true and big brand marketers not only know this but exploit it to get you to buy things you don’t need. By knowing these needs we can begin to understand ourselves and use it to begin taking control of your life. These human needs are:
We all need some sort of stability. We need to feel secure, safe and sound. The most common way is by having a roof over our heads.
We all need some variety in our lives. We all experience variety in different ways good and bad. The adrenaline junkie jumps off perfectly good planes while others use drugs, but the need is the same.
· Affection and Belonging
In every stage of our lives we seek some sort of affection. We seek our affection as children then gradually turn to social groups in school. As adults we seek affection from our partners and acceptance by coworkers and friends.
We all seek significance in different ways. We want to be unique and stand out from the crowd.
There is a need for growth in all of us. We all want to develop ourselves and we express this through a hobby or personal development and accomplishments.
The need to be generous is the need to contribute beyond ourselves. The need to help others.
We are all different with different like and dislikes but we all have these needs. Some fulfill these needs in productive ways and others in destructive ways. What two needs really stand out for you? We want to know this to have mastery over any subject matter.
The Stages of Mastery
If you are asking yourself how to change your state of mind, you will be happy to know that once you understand the basic human needs and the two that are most important to you can begin to master life and anything it throws your way.
· Intellectual Mastery
The first stage of mastery is intellectual. You must first gain the knowledge of a specific issue. Contrary to mainstream thinking knowledge is not power. It is what you do with that knowledge that matters. To turn knowledge into action you must build an emotional connection to it.
· Emotional Mastery
Emotional mastery is where the human needs tie into the stages of mastery. By connecting one of the human needs to a clear vision of your desired results you can form a driving force of action for the knowledge you have mastered.
For example, my two most important human needs for me personally are significance and growth. I have a never-ending thirst for knowledge, reading and learning for the sake of learning. For years I consumed more and more information thinking I would find my purpose but its wasn’t until I placed a “Why” behind it to tie it emotionally. I found that my need to be significant was fueled by the need to give something back. I want to make a difference in others. This emotional tie allowed me to master the subjects I discuss in this blog. There is no frustration and no tiredness because my emotional mastery of the subject gives me the fuel and strength to continue my journey.
After you gain intellectual and emotional mastery, the physical mastery takes over.
Pay close attention to my personal example of emotional mastery and the lack of frustration and tiredness. This is when the physical body just acts without thinking without effort to put things into action. That is physical mastery.
To tie our emotion to our human needs we must ask ourselves powerful questions that will stimulate the creative genius in us.
The Power of Questions
We are curious beings which causes us to question everything in life including our purpose. Every great invention came about by asking questions like energy and matter, for example.
My life coach put it like this, “smart people have the right answers, but geniuses ask the right questions.” One of my mentors, John C. Maxwell says leaders ask great questions and even wrote a book about it. Another one of my mentors, Tony Robbins says quality questions create a quality life. It is only natural for us to ask the right questions within us.
· What do you want?
Tony Robbins likes to say that clarity is power. We must be clear about what it is we want. Do we just want to change in 2018 or do we want to pay off the $50K credit card debt and become financially free by December 31st, 2018? Which do you think gives a specific target where you will not be shooting in the dark? You cannot track what you do not measure.
· Why do you want it?
This question is where the rubber meets the road. What drives you? What will create such an emotion that it gives you goosebumps? We need to feel stimulated by what it is we want and why we want it. This will tie our human needs to emotional mastery.
You can learn the contents in this article from front to back but if you don’t tie to it emotionally that drive to succeed in 2018 will dry up by March much like all the new resolutions to attend a gym. Have you ever seen how many people sign up for gym memberships in January and how many of those still attend regularly after March? It is not many, and it is because there is no why tied to their resolution. They just know they need to do it but not why.
· How to make it happen?
This seems to be the most difficult part but surprisingly it is the easiest to answer. This is just mechanics. When you understand your most important human needs, you have a clear purpose and why you want it, the how will come naturally. The answers will seem to come to you almost as if you stumble upon them.
We live in an age where you can find just about anything on the internet. We have more information easily accessible than Fortune 500 CEO’s had at their disposal 20 years ago. This is the reason startups like Uber and Airbnb can disrupt entire industries. Plus, I will be providing you with all the mechanics you need on this site.
The last piece of the puzzle to make lasting change in 2018 is Faith.
Faith – The Ultimate Key to Success
This article is not meant to push religion or any beliefs on you. When I speak of faith I am not talking specifically about religious belief. I am talking about whatever you decide to believe in.
· Forms of faith
Whatever you choose to believe in whether it is faith in the infinite, supreme being, science, laws of nature, or your own will to succeed, you are right. We are the captains of our fate, the captain of our souls because we have been given the power to control our thoughts.
· Faith and thought
The subconscious mind is extraordinarily powerful. By having a clear end result and purpose and believe that anything is possible your subconscious will begin to form a habit and plan towards your end desire.
· Faith and Emotions
Faith mixed with emotions will give you access to parts of your mind that will release a new level of creative intelligence and will power. We have all heard of the mother lifting a truck to pull her baby from under it. That is faith mixed with a strong emotion at work.
Setting Up for Success
The morning talk shows, news feeds, and blogs are all repeating the same things. Don’t set unrealistic goals etc. They all have great ideas but how long before you run out of juice, 3 months? 6 months? If you browse to my About Me page you will see a quote by Paul “Bear” Bryant that says, “It’s not the will to win that matters, everyone has that, it’s the will to prepare to win that matters.” We must be willing to prepare to win not just get up and work on something without purpose.